Be careful what you wish for.

Hannalee has been difficult lately. She has been very fussy during the day and wouldn't let me set her down lately. Also at night she was waking up 4 to 6 times screaming.

I had been secretly wishing that I could have a night away from all of it, some help with her during the day, and some people socialization. Well, I think I have been taught a very difficult lesson.

Last Friday, April 17 I woke up with a small pinch in my back. It had been there all week. Around 8:00 after our breakfast I went to change Hannalee's diaper and my back seized up entirely. I was changing her on the floor and had the diaper off, but I was totally unable to move without excruciating pain. Thankfully I had my phone in my pocket (thanks mom for telling me earlier in the week to keep it with me). I called Bob, but he couldn't come home at the time. But my dear and wonderful mother said she would be up as soon as possible (about 1 1/2 hour drive). So I called my sweet and extremely helpful neighbor, Jenn. She came immediately over and cared for Hannalee as I lay immobile on the floor. I spent the whole day in pain and unable to move.

When Bob got home he said I needed to go to the hospital. My other neighbor came over and helped Bob give me a blessing. Then they lifted me, screaming, to the car.

At the hospital the doctor poked around and asked me what I could move. I just wanted good drugs to relax my spasming back. (This same thing happened about 5 years ago. Only then it was from a skiing accident.) The doctor tried injecting numbing stuff into the muscle he thought was spasming. However it didn't work. (Lets just say the doctors up here don't have the best rap.) After laying on a gurney in pain for over an hour they finally started an IV and put in the "good stuff." However it took two doses of morphine before I could truly move. After a second opinion from the same type of "competent" doctor they told me to go home and if it hurt in a week come and see him.

As I sat in the wheel chair ready to leave, I got extremely sick to my stomach and turned pail and pretty much passed out. So they kept me over night (The first part of my "wish": a night away from Hannalee.) But after a good nights sleep on lots of drugs I got to go home.

Over the weekend my mom and Bob took good care of me. I could still barely move and definitely couldn't lift Hannie. On Monday my step mom, Robin, came up and suggested taking me to a better doctor. This doctor said it looked like SI joint dysfunction. So Tuesday I got an MRI. All week I have had different people over helping with Hannalee. They have all been wonderful. (Next part of my "wish": help with Hannalee and people to socialize with.)

The MRI showed that I have a tear in my L5 disk in my back and an inflamed SI joint. So I am supposed to stay active, but not too active and let it heal. I am still unable to lift Hannalee so my dear and wonderful husband has been her main caretaker. Hopefully it will heal soon. I have learned my lesson the hard way and all I want is to take care of my baby and carry her and play with her.